Feeding the Right Wolf

Originally, I was going to write a whole post on my frustration and disappointment with regards to my teenage daughter's overwhelming sense of entitlement - or at least note that it no way jibes with mine. But I'm not going to. Here's why.

I saw a version of this on Amy Oops and it really appealed to me. I traced down a version to a Cherokee Prophecy:

An old Cherokee was teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside each one of us," he said to the boy. "It is a fight to the death, and it is between two wolves.

"One is darkness -- he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

"The other is enlighted -- he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

That story spoke to me, not only how people get seduced by the dark side: anger, fear, envy, bigotry, intolerance, but also how people can get overwhelmed with emotions that hurt themselves: self pity, depression, guilt, sense of ill-usage, jealousy, dissatisfaction.

All the energy poured into that dark "wolf," all the credence, time and thought I spend dwelling on slights and feeling under-appreciated, on what I wanted but didn't have, on failings and failures I perceive in myself, that energy is more than wasted. It is an investment in my own unhappiness.

But, if I pour that energy into tolerance and forgiveness, patience and understanding, into a celebration of those aspects of my life that contribute to my happiness, those are an investment in my well-being and, to a lesser effect, the well-being of people around me.

That doesn't mean I can't feel disappointment or can't stand up for myself. The emotions are there whether I feed them or not. But I can choose not to dwell on those aspects that won't go away. The choices those around me make, the things I can't fix. I don't have to hold on to them and let them feed on each other by spending my energies on them.

It seems obvious, even simple. I don't think it's easy.

I suspect, though, it becomes easier with practice.

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I'm Confused

I know, I know, I should avoid politics, but I'm completely confused about the hoopla, the absolute panic out there over the President talking to students in school. What the hell?

Cops come and talk to students at school without causing a panic. Astronauts, poison control experts, fire safety experts, FBI personnel, school administrators, celebrities, politicians... If Ron Paul were to come to my daughter's high school (yes, he's our representative - he ran uncontested), no one would think twice about letting him speak to the kids, and not just a go-to-school lecture. He could pound the drum with his professional agenda because he represents us.

Parents don't demand the right to screen their talks or censor their opinions (and if they feel that strongly, chances are they've already dragged their kids out of school to homeschool). Unless a teacher does something completely off the wall (like teach *gasp* evolution), most parents don't feel the need to screen everything children hear in school. And that's a good thing.

Folks, Obama represents as well. We, in fact, voted him to head up our government, represent our interests, lead the executive branch. We should not be panicked at the notion that he's going to address our children about education. He is a living breathing example of education gone well. He has made no bones about his opinions on this subject, that he takes it seriously, that he considers education a key to our future. If you don't want your kids to get that message, why are they in school at all?

If we can't trust the President to talk to our kids why would we trust him with the office we've elected him to? What are we mad about? That he is open and communicative, not just with children but with all of us? Oh, the horror!

If you bought into this whole hysteria, perhaps you should pause and reflect. When we start panicking, not over what someone has done, but what we're afraid will happen (with absolutely no evidence that those fears are justified), perhaps we should ask ourselves the real reasons we're so reluctant to treat the man we elected with trust, why the reactions we so often hear are so extreme. I hate to ascribe anything to racism, but it's challenging not to think that people wouldn't be so quick to judge, so easy to manipulate if they weren't distrustful at some level of his skin color, if those prejudices are really overcome. If you are worried about him, write down the crimes he's committed to date, the horrible things done and ask yourself if he's really committed a crime or if it's presumed future crimes that really are getting him painted with the ugly brush.

And ask yourself if fear, prejudice, and paranoia are really a better lesson for our children than the lessons he is trying to impart.

One last observation. Am I the only one who thinks it would be a very canny policy to remain calm in the face of unending paranoia and hysteria so that the wolf-callers and fearmongers would have ample opportunity to look foolish and be demonstrated wrong over and over?

Just sayin'.

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