Not My Cheeriest Poem

It's been a while since I wrote poetry. I think I know why.

When I was young, I bought the tale
I think you know the yarn,
Where the girl who's really special
Is awakened to her charms

And the years she went unnoticed,
Was dismissed, ignored or used,
Were worth the happy ending
With her chrysalis unloosed

I used that through a childhood
Where I always came up short.
I used that through a loveless marriage
'Til I left, a last resort.

I knew most didn't like me. I confused them,
Rubbed them wrong.
I took that as the price I paid
For singing different songs.

But I believed that I was "special"
No matter how I was dismissed.
My faith was like a talisman
To lead me through the mist.

I held it when I found the man
I loved like none before,
And knew, this man would cherish me
Appreciate my core.

But faith can't stand 'gainst data
At least not in my mind,
And decades of the same facts
Have made that dream unwind.

If all perceive me one way,
Nothing special, nothing grand,
Perhaps they see a bitter truth
I chose not to understand.

Perhaps there is no magic,
Not for me at any rate.
Perhaps no happy ending,
No fine deserving fate.

Perhaps they really see me,
Know all that I could be.
Perhaps the dribs and drabs of love
Are all I get to see.

I ask myself what is the truth?
With facts I've gleaned since birth.
Do they not really see me
Or do I have little worth?