Saturday Quotathon and some thoughts of my own

>> Saturday, October 24, 2009

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I've been blogging pretty regularly now for more than a year. I've always taken it very seriously. When I decided I needed to exercise as regularly, I thought tying the two together would work to my benefit. Now, being sick for more than a week and having it carry forward even into the next week with nausea hardly helps. But, even as I started feeling better, I was rather bowled over by the mindset that made me reluctant to work out because then I was committed to doing blogs, too.

Admittedly, I've been writing gangbusters on a new novel and I've really been enjoying it. And, yes, I love my readers, but, at this moment, I'm struggling to find the time for all the stuff that I'm already doing. My point is that, exercising or not, my blogging might get even more spotty as I take on some new responsibilities at work (which unfortunately require hanging out in more meetings, some later in the day), dive into some more writing (and marketing of said work), and, to an extent, live my life. Perhaps I don't have as much to say as I used to.

Well, we'll see. In the meantime, here are some quotes. I'll take time to be here on the weekends anyway. At least until I run out of quotes.

How about some more humor?

The best cure for insomnia is a Monday morning
-Sandy Cooley

It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on Earth has ever produced the phrase, 'as pretty as an airport.' Airports are ugly. Some are very ugly. Some attain a degree of ugliness that can only be the result of a special effort.
-Douglas Adams

Dennis Hutch had stepped up into the top seat when its founder had died of a lethal overdose of brick wall, taken while under the influence of a Ferrari and a bottle of tequila.
-Douglas Adams

I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it...
-- Groucho Marx

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying
-- Ed Furgol
(It's a sad commentary on our species that so much of humor is insulting and focused on appearance - ed)

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
- George Bernard Shaw

Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement.
- Mark Twain

Her face was her chaperone.
- Rupert Hughes

I see her as one great stampede of lips directed at the nearest derriere.
- Noel Coward

Nature played a cruel trick on her by giving her a waxed mustache.
- Alan Bennett

She is a peacock in everything but beauty.
- Oscar Wilde

She not only kept her lovely figure, she's added so much to it.
- Bob Fosse

She was a large woman who seemed not so much dressed as upholstered.
- James Matthew Barrie

She was so ugly she could make a mule back away from an oat bin.
- Will Rogers

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on with a pitchfork.
- Jonathan Swift

The tautness of his face sours ripe grapes.
- William Shakespeare

He is a man of splendid abilities but is utterly corrupt. He shines and stinks like rotten mackerel by moonlight.
- John Randolph

He never bore a grudge against anyone he wronged.
- Simone Signoret

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
- Mark Twain

Elizabeth Taylor's so fat, she puts mayonnaise on an aspirin.
- Joan Rivers

She looks like she combs her hair with an egg beater.
- Critic Louella Parsons on Joan Collins

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
- P. G. Wodehouse

There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure.
- Jack E. Leonard

Another victory like that and we are done for.
- Pyrrhus

He missed an invaluable opportunity to hold his tongue.
- Andrew Lang

I would not want to put him in charge of snake control in Ireland.
- Eugene McCarthy

In a mere half century films have gone from silent to unspeakable.
- Doug Larson

Awards are like hemorrhoids; sooner or later every asshole gets one.
- Frederic Raphael

I am fairly unrepentant about her poetry. I really think that three quarters of it is gibberish. However, I must crush down these thoughts, otherwise the dove of peace will shit on me.
- Noel Coward on Edith Sitwell

This isn't right. This isn't even wrong.
- Wolfgang Pauli
And I still have more humor for the future. Woot!

7 comments:

  • Roy
     

    Heh, heh! That second Douglas Adams quote is a classic! If you have copies of his and John Lloyd's The Meaning of Liff and The Deeper Meaning of Liff you'll never run out of humorous quotes.

    Sorry to hear we might be seeing less of you online, but I can definitely undersatand the circumstances.

  • The Mother
     

    It takes a truly gifted wit to turn an insult into something poetic.

  • Stephanie B
     

    There is something to be said for the come backs and put downs that were a bit more intelligent that today's more common "F*#$ you" and "Bite me."

    Churchill was something of a master, but I think I used most of my Churchill already.

  • Project Savior
     

    Favorite Churchill come back. A playwright friend sent him two tickets to his play with a note, "Bring a lady friend if you have one."
    Churchill replied, "I'll bring my lady friend to your second night, if you have one."

  • Stephanie B
     

    That's a good one and I have it on my stash, though it's not my favorite of his comebacks, which are either his response to "Sir, you are drunk!" (which he responded with "And you, madame, are ugly, but in the morning I'll be sober.") and "If I were your wife I should poison your tea," to which he replied, "If I were your husband, I should drink it."

  • Jeff King
     

    I agree, finding time and topics is a strugle every day.. plus if your in the zone on a story don't stop for anything. because i know you can't stop even if you wanted to..

    i don't mind waiting for a few days for new topics... as long as you don't quit, then it is all good.

  • Shakespeare
     

    My favorite of the above is this one:

    In a mere half century films have gone from silent to unspeakable.
    - Doug Larson

    Though I do love the Churchill ones, too--especially those in your comment above.

    Lord knows I don't blame you for not blogging every day. I've had to get a bit off it myself, just to stay sane, though I might try to post more often. I've decided that if I have something to say, something eating at me, I'll post it. Otherwise, I'm working on revising my novel. I have less than a week to work on it, so I need to get to it! NaNoWriMo is starting Nov. 1, and a friend and I have decided to take the plunge for the first time ever. My book will be about a mermaid--ooh, but I need a rough outline before I get to this.

    Must get to work. At least I'm finally excited about something.

    Do what excites you (and what pays the bills), and if blogging isn't it every day, that's okay (not that you need my permission!)...

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